7 quick takes

1. Today is the 2nd day of December and NaBlPoMo has been over for a couple of days. I was feeling a bit inadequate (as these damn self imposed goals of blogging often make me feel) and I realized I posted 5, yes FIVE, times in one month. If you view my previous months of blogging since the last NaBlMoPo you will see the standard is once a month. I posted five times my usual output; I refuse to feel like a failure over this, HA!

2. Today is my birthday and I am sad to leave 42 behind. I loved being 42. Last year I declared it the year of “the meaning of life the universe and everything” and it gave me a little jolt of geeky delight every time I told someone how old I was. I carried around a towel in my car and I Note to add: I am still about 10 years old on the inside so I purposely told people how old I was just so I could tell them I was 42, strange I know.

3. Thanksgiving falls on the last Friday of the month of November. My school makes us make up the day off for Thanksgiving on the following Friday. This means that I will not have a day off for my birthday until 2012 and it will fall on a Sunday, then it I will have to wait until 2017 to get it off again. I am not happy about this. Hopefully by 2017 I will be done with school and teaching at a proper University and have the day off because we don’t have to make up the time. (the real reason I want a master’s degree, my birthday off)

4. I got an Archos 5 internet tablet palm PC for my birthday and I think I want to marry it. Not only is it WAAAAAYY less expensive than an IPad or even a Kindle but also it has expandable memory, it runs on the Android platform, it has a built in reader program so I can use it like a Kindle, it has a speaker, a microphone, a camera and I can access the internet. Oh and there are apps which I can download AND there is a fun game called Angry Birds that I believe I am addicted to. Oh, I can also do work stuff from it and keep my calendar on it and it will even sync with my PC. It must be love, love, looooovvveee.

5. I have started drinking hot tea again. I love tea, especially hot tea but here in Texas it is just too darn hot in the spring, summer and early autumn to think about drinking something hot. Now that the temps have dropped to the 60s and 70s I am back in business. I really like Constant Comment and Darjeeling teas, what kind do you like?

6. I am going to Austin to visit my friend Phil this weekend. He and I have been friends for years and years and he moved to Texas about a year and a half before I did. Even though we only live about 3 hours apart we don’t get to visit nearly enough. I am really looking forward to this.

7. I read an interesting article on a technique used to treat post traumatic stress disorder called “Tapping”. It deals with the hippocampus and creating a disassociation with the event and emotions that caused the trauma similar to” when one wakes up from a nightmare and realized that one is safe in bed”. The technique calls for tapping certain parts of the face, hands and body while dealing with the emotional arousal of the remembered incident. It has a lot of success in treating post war PTSD. Pretty interesting, if you want to know more check out this website: http://www.hgi.org.uk/archive/PTSD_Trauma_Treatments.htm there are others but this one is rather concise.

I am thinking about moving to a new house. My landlord has another house that I can rent at the same rent as I currently pay so that she can rent my current house at a much higher rent than I am currently paying, which is good for her and would be great for me because the other house is on a bayou. Yes, at the end of my future long sloping yard is an arm of "Little Vince Bayou". This is exciting to me because of the wildlife that will be coming by, of course there are fish in the water but also there are nutrias (see image at the top left), which look like very large muskrats (they can weigh as much as 20 pounds) and have deep orange front incisor teeth. They build their burrows on the banks of rivers and are generally interesting to watch.
Also there are turtles, great blue herons, snowy egrets, some roseate spoon bills, and some other water fowl that I am unfamiliar with.

The most exciting thing to me is that in theory I could have some ducks. I would love to get a few of these babies (see image left) they are called Runner Ducks and they are just as cute as a bug's ear. The neighborhood has a flock of exotic waterfowl that the neighborhood feeds and maintains and that wander the bayou. I think that Runner Ducks would make a great contribution to the flock. I am a little worried about alligators eating them but the other waterfowl seem alright so perhaps it isn't much of a problem.

I don't know if everything will work out with the new house, my landlord will let me know in January if it is available. Until then I am going to be doing research on ducks to see if it is feasible.

Gratitude for frugality

I am feeling so grateful for the people in my life who have taught me and modeled for me frugality. When I was growing up we were rather poor and we were way ahead of the trendy recycle curve, I have been making do, reusing and recycling my whole life.

When I was a kid my grandma (who raised me) was not what one would call domestic and I eschewed all things I perceived as “woman’s work”, so learn cooking and meal planning at my grandma’ s frugal knee, I did not. My grandma’s version of home-made food was to recombine processed products into a new thing. Her best dish was to take minute steaks roll them around Stove Top stuffing and stick a tooth pick through them then cover the whole thing with cream of mushroom soup and bake. Quite tasty, but not exactly from scratch nor without sodium count to give a blue whale hypertension. She had a lot going on in her life and she tried her best but Julia Child she was not.

When I was 18 I went to live with my ex-fiancé’s brother and sister-in-law. Not only did they change my life simply by the way they lived truly Christ like lives but also Ellen taught me about meal planning, grocery shopping, and generally living within my means while still living well. To this day I use the lessons she taught me about stretching my food budget, household management and living well. I am so thankful to her for giving me that gift (plus she is the only other person I know besides me who reads in the shower). Thanks to the Internet I have been able to reconnect with Ellen and wonder of wonders she posts the recipes I remember from those halcyon days of my life that I have great nostalgia for. As a wonderful extra added value the recipes are completely within my food budget, whoo hoo!

I try to share frugal living tips with my students. Most of them are single moms with minuscule incomes. Whenever I am feeling constrained by my budget I think about them and their struggles. I have one student who has 2 children under 5 and lives on slightly more than minimum wage. When she finishes the program and gets her certification she will be able to make more than 3 times what she makes now. Many of my students are in the same boat. By passing along frugal tips I am hoping I can help them deal with the increase in their incomes and to help them pay off their student loans by living well within their means. Not only that but I think that by providing positive reinforcement for frugal living I help normalize it. Our culture is so consumption driven and people feel bad if they are not rolling in expensive crap, I am hoping that by my speaking about ways to live within one’s means it will make it seem not less than but a better alternative to the consumer culture. At least I can hope.

Navel gazing/whining about my acedemic career (try to restrain you excitement)

I am the first woman in my family to complete high school and (when I finally finish in the summer) will be the first person in my family to get a bachelor’s degree. In the fall I will then be starting my master’s program, a double master’s a MBA in health care management and a MS in public health education. I am pretty damn excited about the idea of getting a master’s but I am feeling a little alone in the world with it. I wish I had someone who could hold my hand through what has been a somewhat arduous process of selecting and then getting accepted to a program.

As the end of my bachelor’s and the beginning of my master’s get nearer I swing from excited anticipation to anxiety and back. Can I do the work? Will I be able to swing working full time in a demanding career with a master’s program? Will writer’s block return and kick my ass? I find that daily I have to release desire and release expectations with all this. I have to relax and be in the idea that I will have sufficient grace to do what must be done.

I tend to be a planner, a worrier and a perfectionist at times. These traits have actually served me but sometimes they can rise to a rather neurotic level and it is a pisser to make them shut the hell up.

I am finding that exercise has been a balm to my agonizing. There is something about working up a sweat that calms me down. It seems to take all that nervous energy and focus it on something which, for a little while at least, drains it of energy and makes me feel so much better.

Taking action and list making are soothing. I have done everything I can to do with what must be done between now and then and now I just need to walk in the plan. This is comforting as well.

I find I do best when I quit focusing on myself and my problems. When I am able to look outward instead of inward, to talk to my friends (several of whom have master’s degrees) and to believe what they tell me that I will do just fine.

What wonder is this. . .warning:rambling post

This Friday I get to go to a teacher training. I absolutely love these things. I get to hob knob with seasoned teacher and they are SO amazingly generous with their advice. I carry around a little note book so I can jot notes after conversations because they just casually spout pure teaching gold. Coming into teaching in a rather backwards way has resulted in some odd learning curve bumps for me. I worked in the health care industry for nearly 20 years before I started teaching. The HC industry is VERY different from the teaching industry.
When I started teaching I decided to stop with the corporate climbing, the press for power and just relax and be with the moment of teaching. Now, after 2.5 years of it I am amazed at the personal transformation that has been wrought in me from this powering down. I am so much more relaxed and happy. (Of course it really doesn't hurt that I love what I do and by in large most every day is a fun adventure in magic joy land) I enjoyed being an auditor for compliance and I enjoyed performing physician and staff education I did, I actually thought I loved it. Compared to teaching however, it is a pale, pale love.

I am going to have to leave teaching temporarily rather soon and this really makes me very sad. Once I finish my certification I need to get a job and make some serious money for awhile so I can fund my master's degree and not be in some super crazy amount of debt from student loans (like nearly $100,000 of debt).
I know it sounds dramatic but the thought of leaving teaching makes me want to cry. The thing is that if I go back into the health care industry I will make more than double what I make as a teacher, yes friends that's right MORE than double. The plan is to pay for my master's degree as I go and not get any additional student loans while also paying down what I owe on my undergrad loans because they will be in deferment and I can pay against the principle. Fortunately I have no debt other than the student loans. It all makes just great sense on paper, it seems like the logical and rational thing to do but honestly it just feels dreadful. I also really need the master's degree, if I want to teach at the university level it is essential. ::deep resigned sigh::

I am hoping that I can find a job in the industry working at a teaching hospital or working in a training department that pays as well as my usual position as an administrator or an auditor. That way I could be well paid enough to do what I need to do financially and still be teaching. Here's hoping.

Are you alright, I noticed you just fainted from getting 2 blogs in 2 days, woah yah scared me there.

NaBlPoMo Welcome to November

It is November already and never you mind that I didn’t post at all in October, I was busy procrastinating, shhhhhhhhhh.

So November is National Blog Posting Month and now for the second year in a row I am taking a stab at it. The idea is to post daily; I am shooting for at least weekly.

Thoughts for today:
Tomorrow is the election and I am, as usual, wishing for candidates who I genuinely like as opposed to having to pick the lesser of 2 evils. I really want to have representation that appreciates the little things like oh, say THE CONSTITUTION and THE BILL OF RIGHTS, ahem. Let’s not even get started on my general dismay over elected officials who want to abandon due process simply because they are outraged by the crime committed (the exact time when due process is MOST needed IMHO). My further dismay at those politicians who want to make their version of Christianity the state religion and work on building a theocracy, not based on Christ like love but on some distorted view of crusade mentality. My horror over those fear mongering bigoted reactionary politicians who build consensus not based on the shining light of reason, moderation and equality but on fear, xenophobia and EMOTIONAL knee jerk hatred. Alright, deep breath. . .
I dream of the day when I can find a true Jeffersonian republican or a politician who can be both one who values life and freedom, who is moderate, respectful, honorable, honest, scholarly and in possession of integrity.
I know, I know . . . dream on little dreamer.

My old friend the Day Book

Outside my window
The sun is shining the humidity is low and the temp is a wonderful 70 degrees, this is the part of the year when Texas starts calming down the oven like temperatures and we get great weather for about 7 months. Oh joy oh bliss oh going outside without dying of heat exhaustion!
I am thinking
Lately I have been thinking about endurance and what makes people persevere. Internal motivation and intention seems to give the grit and guts to keep the faith and keep going. Engagement in the world, caring about the work passionately, focus -all these things help but without the internal will to keep going, to dust off and start again they mean nothing but nice ideas.
I am thankful for
The beautiful weather, the lessons my students teach me again and again, compassion, good coffee, long hugs, napping, that my hard work over the last 3 months lowerd my bad cholesterol and raised my good cholesterol, I am almost in the healthy range for the bad!
From the kitchen
This weekend I am making boudin (pronounced boo-dan) in honor of the rice festival I am attending. For those not in the know (which was me up to about a year ago) boudin is a Cajun sausage made with rice, meat and spicy seasonings squished together and stuffed into a casing using a cow horn with the tip cut off. (This is the recipe I am using) I am also omitting the cow horn for a sausage stuffer made of plastic (which I might add looks rather like a cow horn with the end cut off).
I am wearing
I should just omit this question, from Monday –Thursday for 18 hours each day I wear scrubs. I was initially so excited to not worry about what to wear for work, think of the laundry I won’t have to do, think of the time I will save. Now I am tired of looking like a blue stuffed animal in my white marshmallow shoes. At least I am comfortable in sensible footwear, right, bright side to everything.
I am creating
Anxiety, my students are working on a rather hard test as I type
I am going
To Winnie, TX this weekend to attend the Rice Festival, there is a parade with not 1 but 2 combines AND they will crown some lucky young lady the Rice Queen and she will ride forth with her court on said combines wearing a rather large tiara a sparkly gown, white opera length gloves, holding a scepter and with enough hair spray to personally have her own ozone hole. I love Texas
I am reading
“The Four Agreements” I am not too happy with this book and am seriously considering abandoning it, it actually recommends putting away rational though and critical thinking. . . riiiigggghhhtttttt.
The four agreements are 1. Be impeccable with your word, 2. Don’t take anything personally, 3. Don’t make assumptions, and 4. Always do your best . I can get behind the agreements, they sound good, but the methods of obtaining these agreements, eh not so much for me I am thinking. I will try to keep an open mind as my boss’s boss recommended it and says he bases his management style on it, ugh
I am hoping
That all my hard work will result in a substantial increase in my salary.
I am hearing
Pages turning on reference manuals, furious writing, and deep sighing. . . the sounds of test taking
Around the house
My house is TRASHED. I haven’t cleaned in like 2 weeks and it is getting a little out of hand. If I don’t clean soon I am worried about sleeping and the dust bunnies carrying me off.
One of my favorite things
Other than not cleaning my house I enjoy napping, walks on the beach just as the sun is coming up or in the middle of the night on a full moon.
A few plans for the rest of the week
Tomorrow, laundry and house cleaning, Saturday is the rice festival and Sunday I think I shall read, nap and perhaps watch a movie or 2
Words I am pondering
“If God sends us on strong paths, we are provided strong shoes.” Corrie Tenboom
“Endurance is patience concentrated.” Thomas Carlyle

Here is a picture I am sharing : I just want to snuzzle their tummies!

They are young flying squirrels by the way.

Day Book

Outside my window
It is HOT HOT HOT, according to the weather service it is 105.4 outside and with the heat index it feels like 108 it is also very sunny and clear with a tiny breeze.

I am thinking
About myth and archetype, to paraphrase Carl Jung, archetypes are organs of the psyche as the stomach and intestines are organs of the body, just as often when someone is sick there is a problem with the function of an organ so it is when an individual has a psychological disturbance it is related to issues with the archetypes

I am thankful for
Time alone, without it I would get cagey, odd and crankier than normal

From the kitchen
This weekend I cooked Monterey beans and cheese taken from SalomeEllen. One taste and it made me miss my old friends in Port Huron horribly.

I am wearing
Let’s not talk about today because I have on my de rigor scrubs. . . this weekend I wore a long black skirt with purple flowers on it, a black tank top and a purple over shirt, black clogs and an amethyst necklace and silver rings.

I am creating
A document for my students that is a short hand guide to diagnosis sequencing for both in and outpatient care

I am going
To have the whole house to myself for 2 days- my house mate is going to Broken Arrow, OK to pick up a car.

I am reading
“The Origin and History of Consciousness” by Eric Neumann and “The Silver Chair” by CS Lewis as well as a very lengthy article called “Recombinant human erythropoietin counteracts secondary injury and markedly enhances neurological recovery from experimental spinal cord trauma” by A. Gorio et al From the 2002 National Academy of Sciences meeting

I am hoping
I will keep finding my time at the gym fun. The weather is miserable out and the gym is nice and cool, also when I can go mid day it is full of interesting old people

I am hearing
The CPR training going on next door for the new students

Around the house
There has been a dramatic increase in dust and fur on my floor. I don’t know what the cleaning fairies are up to but sweeping has not been on the list.

One of my favorite things
Waking up before my alarm and lying in bed half awake and half asleep listening to the train whistle in the distance

A few plans for the rest of the week
I have so much grading to do it isn’t even funny. I believe if I spend every spare moment grading between now and Thursday I should finish in time. Why do I assign so much work again?

Words I am pondering
“The shadow, which is in conflict with the acknowledged values, cannot be accepted as a negative part of one's own psyche and is therefore projected--that is, it is transferred to the outside world and experienced as an outside object. It is combated, punished, and exterminated as 'the alien out there' instead of being dealt with as one's own inner problem” Eric Neumann

Here is a picture I am sharing:

Outside my window:
It is raining to beat the band. There is a tropical depression in the Gulf and this means buckets of rain for me. The good news is that if I survive the flooding the next few days (which I have off) will be beautiful, sunny and low humidity (for Texas that is).

I am thinking:
Due to a problem with my financial aid I may be having a hard time paying for my last semester this fall. This has caused a crisis of confidence (not to mention a potential delay in grad school). It has made me realize that I am getting far too much of my value from the external (my education and job) and not enough from the internal. I really wish I could learn these lessons in a less dramatic way. This looming doubt about my future has put me in a funk and brought up all sorts of pleasant issues like my value and worth. I wish that when things go wrong I would not turn on myself like a pack of rabid dogs. It really would make life better. The funny thing is that for “real” crises like those that threaten my physical safety or basic needs I feel completely empowered but for non critical crisis (like this one) I immediately become super hard on myself and engage in unhealthy hypercritical behavior and thoughts. Being aware of it certainly helps but it doesn’t always change it. The way I am dealing with it is to go into super self care mode, you know, eat right, sleep, drink water, exercise daily, and avoid caffeine and sugar. I also try to replace the negative with positive but at the moment it feels like a losing battle. Oh joy.

I am thankful for:
A job I LOVE that I am fortunate enough to be good at. A curious mind, the willingness and discipline to self educate.

From the kitchen:
It has been so hot here that the kitchen is pretty closed except for salad and pasta. This weekend I am stuffing a pork loin with cherries and goat cheese and grilling it.

I am wearing:
My usual uniform: navy blue scrubs, white socks, white orthopedic clogs, silver rings and earrings

I am creating:
I am decorating my room in the British Colonial India style. I have never really had a decorating theme before and this is proving to be fun.

I am going:
To go to my first yoga class this weekend. According to the handout for the class it is the best thing since sliced enlightenment and will make me as flexible as a 12 year old Circ du Soleil contortionist. I remain skeptical.

I am reading:
“The Origins and History of Consciousness” by Erich Neumann (a student of CG Jung)

I am hoping:
My financial aid woe will work out and the start for my masters program will not be delayed

I am hearing:
Ravi Shankar “Bridges”

Around the house:
The dust bunnies have mutated into horrible beasts with a vicious streak a mile wide and big nasty pointy teeth

One of my favorite things:
Going to the ocean at dawn with my dog, sun just rising and the beach to myself

A few plans for the rest of the week:
This weekend I am going to finish my deep clean/organization of my room. I am going to take a nice long steam and sauna after my yoga class and perhaps go for a swim after.

Words I am pondering:
“There are 2 kinds of people, those who love you and those who don’t. Those who love you won’t care and those who don’t, don’t matter” John Thomas

Here is a picture I am sharing:

This was taken at my goddaughter's baptism

Left to right

Rae: the adoptive mom

Shirly (in the wheelchair): Rae's mom

Paul: (guy with grey at the temple) Tony's godfather

Tony: (boy to the right of Shirley) Soleil's brother

Me (Christina):(chick with the white shirt) godmother

Tristan: (man with the pink shirt) he is a friend of Shirley

Outside my window:
Everyone is up in arms about hurricane Alex but outside the sky is blue and there are just a few towering fluffy clouds. It is only 86 degrees with 66% humidity; veritably mild for Houston this time of year.
I am thinking:
I am wondering where I am going to put all the stuff that was in my spare room, now my guest room. When I moved to Texas from Michigan I got rid of pretty much anything extraneous, how is it that I have a TON of stuff that I don’t know what to do with that I don’t use all the time, has it bred, did I secretly buy stuff with money I stole from someone while I was sleeping, how could this be. Hurumph
I am thankful for:
People who love me
From the kitchen:
This weekend I made dark chocolate malt-o-meal and it was amazingly good. It tasted like dark chocolate brownies.
I am wearing:
The usual, scrubs
I am creating:
A guide to the NCCI for my students with information on modifiers and CMS and their wily ways.
I am going:
Nowhere in particular for many days
I am reading:
The Magician’s Nephew by CS Lewis
I am hoping:
I will be able to recover from the disaster of needing a new engine for my car. I have had it less than 2 years and I just (4 months ago) put a transmission in the darn thing, now it needs a new engine. After this I will have a new car.
I am hearing:
The air handlers humming and the sound of some of my students talking in the hall (class got out an hour ago and they are still hanging about)
Around the house:
I need to do a deep clean and reorganization of my room, before the corner dust monsters get me
One of my favorite things:
When I feel deeply pleased with myself or have accomplished something of note I love to go to a swanky hotel bar and drink really fine bourbon and smoke a cigar all alone.
A few plans for the rest of the week:
Marinate and grill chicken thighs that I ran out of time for on Sunday
Words I am pondering:
“What good is a magic ring that lets you see other worlds if you are too afraid to look at them when you get there” CS Lewis “The Magician’s Nephew”
Here is a picture I am sharing:

I went kite flying and here is the kite

My summer as a slacker

Today is my last day of school for awhile. I have decided to take the summer off from the school I attend. Shocking, isn’t it? I have been going to college now for 6 years, year round nonstop. Why is this taking so long, you may wonder, the answer is that pesky thing called work. For several years I could only take 1 or 2 classes at a time. This period was seriously slow going for my education. For the last little while I have been going to school full time and now as I am almost done, I am taking the summer off. For the next 3 months there will be no crazed studying, no cranking out of 18 essays a week, no mass undertakings of writing about the minutia (with great zeal I might add) of health care and the business of medicine.
What am I going to do with myself? How will I cope not being constantly under a deadline, not having to produce hundreds of pages of writing? I don’t know but my guess is it will involve napping, reading , painting and with a little luck some travel. Who knows, I may get all wild and crazy and write some short stories.
Unlike public school teachers I do have to work over the summer. I may revamp some of my lesson plans in my spare time, or I may do no such thing. I like having the option.

There are so many things I WANT to do they are in no particular order:

1. I really want to do some in depth reading on Germanic myths and about the cult of Odin.

2. I want to refresh my Latin and translate at least 2 chapters of Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone (yes I am that much of a geek that I have a few of the Harry Potter books in Latin),

3. I want to reread the Silmarillion (after reading about the Germanic myths to see how they are related),

4. I want to paint- I have been so busy I haven’t made a single painting since I started school full time.

5. I want to cook and try out new recipes.

6. I want to reorganize and deep clean my room and perhaps paint one of the walls a good color.

7. I want to tighten up Lily’s training.

8. I want to go camping.

9. I want to get some IT certifications so I can make some money doing tech support for roll outs.

More than all that though I want to have the weekend open before me to do whatever I want or nothing at all. I don’t want to think about schedules and plans and breaking down larger tasks. I want to be kid like (as least for 1 day a week) and just be. I hope I can be still enough to enjoy that.

Day Book

Outside my window:
It is hot out tonight, in the mid to upper 80s and very clear. The moon is a sliver and the air smells salty.

I am thinking:
I am really frustrated with my health insurance and my benefits administrator at my job. I need to get my credit repaired so I can get loan to cover a procedure that I need to have done but my insurance plan specifically excludes, even if medically necessary, bastids.

I am thankful for:
I am thankful that my grandma raised me to be tenacious of spirit and that I am willing to change. I am thankful that I have been accepted into 2 masters programs. I am thankful that I love my job and that Texas is such an interesting place. I am thankful that I finally feel at home somewhere in the world, it has been a very long time since I have felt that way.

From the kitchen:
I made chicken enchiladas this Saturday and they were quite good and plentiful enough to give me lunch through Wednesday

I am wearing:
Navy blue scrubs, white Dansko shoes, white support socks, my usual uniform.

I am creating:
My 75g fish tank is coming together. I need to do some rearranging and gather some materials from nature to toss in the tank. My female Apistogramma are coming to me next weekend, if all goes well I should have fry within a month.

I am going:
To die of a heart attack if I don't get a grip on my triglyceride level.

I am reading:
"Elevated plasma glucose and lowered triglyceride levels from omega-3 fatty acid supplementation in type II diabetes" Friday, KE; Childs, MT; Tsunehara, CT; et al
Created for the National Diabetes Association

I am hoping:
That I will be straightening out my crazy financial melt down soon and things will return to budgeting normalcy.

I am hearing:
The air conditioner humming and my students talking about the project they are working on.

Around the house:
I need to clean my room this weekend, a deep cleaning the dog fur is getting a bit intense.

One of my favorite things:
Having the whole house to myself

A few plans for the rest of the week:
Writing a letter to my goddaughter in Spanish, writing letters to a couple of people who are due for some real mail in their lives, figuring out what to give my mom for mother's day

This weekend:
I am going to visit Jana's Aunt Peen who is 96 years old and can whip your butt at gin and is still quite sassy, love her

I am pondering:
"It isn't who is going to let me, it's who is going to stop me" Ayn Rand

Here is a picture I am sharing:
Another picture of my Lily dog. She always wants to lick the camera or, as in this picture, seems to want to give me a dubious look:

Loosely connected thoughts from my brain to yours

Image credit Ram Dass

I just got back from a visit to Detroit to see my lovies there. I miss them all so much it makes me ache. I find that although I miss the people mightily I do not so much miss the place.
When did Detroit become so ugly and when did strangers start looking so sad and angry at the same time, has everyone always been that rude or has something changed or have I gone soft on Southern manners and sunshiny winters?

Part of my trip was a drive Rae and I took from Detroit to South Bend to visit my mom. I really love that drive, it is through small towns with Victorian houses and long expanses filled with corn, soybean and hay fields cut by a curvy 2 lane highway. That drive always fills me with a peaceful alertness that is often hard to find elsewhere.

My mom and I have a challenging relationship sometimes and this visit was no exception. This time however, instead of letting her usual anxiety venting method of attempting to control and manipulate me upset me I just let it roll off. I tried to embrace her and recognize her outburst as a sign of her anxiety and her attempt to cope with it. It honestly made the whole visit better. Rae also made a perfectly timed comment that completely lightened the mood and set it all in perspective. I love it when that happens.


Lately I have been thinking about the 3rd noble truth of Buddhism, that says, (pardon my paraphrase Buddhists), the way to end suffering is to release desire. I find that by living in the present moment, without anxious thoughts to the future and without being chained to the past I am the most at peace with myself and those around me. It is very hard to do this releasing of desire. I keep opening my hand whenever I am aware of myself grasping but it is a tricky business. Back in the prehistoric reaches of my youth I had an acid trip that taught me to "let it go and just be". The unpacking of this is an ongoing process even now, some 20+ years later. I tend to live in my head and I find that by doing that my poor overworked brain keeps ruminating on the past and the future. If I can center myself in my body it is much easier to be in the present. What works for me is when I am spinning on recriminations and or possibilities, worries and doubts is I try to focus on my breathing. To feel the air moving in and out of my lungs, my diaphragm, coastal and diacostal muscles moving. It also helps to press my feet into the ground and feel my toes moving to keep my balance. By focusing on my body and my breath it slows down my mind and allows me to be in the present a bit more clearly. Another exercise that helps is to become sensually aware of my surroundings to ask myself, what am I smelling, hearing, touching, etc.

A great benefit of being present in the moment is that time neither drags or flies by. I see the end of my life is closer than the beginning and am determined to do whatever techniques I can in order to savor and use the time I have left.

Random blogging miscellanea while my students take their finals

I love to cook. The last couple weekends I have been a cooking fiend thanks to my students. We got into a conversation about balance of life, school and work and I encouraged them to find one thing that they love that they don’t think they have time for and to do it for themselves even if it is only for a short time. After we discussed this for awhile a student said to me Ms O you are a student and you work full time what do you love that you are not doing? So I told them about cooking and they challenged me to practice what I preach (I also think they are hoping on scoring baked goods). I have cooked all sorts of things since then, stuffed green peppers, meatloaf, cardiac referral potatoes, lemon bars, spicy fried chicken thighs; oven fried chicken breasts, Spanish rice, green beans. This weekend I am planning on making pumpkin cake with cinnamon cream cheese frosting and pork roast with baked sweet potato fries. Next thing I need to do is make some friends down here so I can invite them over for dinner, ‘cause I really love to throw dinner parties.

Hello, my name is Christina and I am addicted to audiobooks. For the past several weeks I have been listening to the audiobook of “Atlas Shrugged” as read by Scott Brick. Before that it was “Jane Eyre” as read by a woman with a lovely English accent who’s name escapes me at the moment. I listen to it every day, on my dive, before I fall asleep, when I take a nap, I am strung out I tell yah. When I was a kid I loved being read to, as an adult I find a distinct lack of people willing to read to me, so enter the audiobook, now if only I could get it to rub my back.

I have finally decided what I am going to put into my 75 gallon acrylic fish tank. I have been agonizing over this for weeks. I use agonizing but really I have been delighted to do the research on the fish I am considering and their individual requirements. I am setting up a biotope tank. A biotope tank is one that mimics a little slice of the natural environment where your inhabitants come from, everything from the same sort of dirt and rock to water parameters to fellow tankmates. I am going with a Brazil Amazon river tank. I am going with Geophagus Brasiliensis, Geophagus Jurupari, Red Heros Severum, perhaps some apistogramma I really haven’t decided on the exact species yet. I am getting excited though. The next step is setting up all the driftwood and plants then letting the tank run for a few weeks and then FISH, whoo hoo!

I need to go out dancing soon; I think I forgot how it has been so long.

Alright, my students are finishing and the brain smoke is clearing, bye for now!



Because I always have to throw in a picture, here is a look at my very empty fish tank

Day book

My friend @ http://salomeellen.blogspot.com/ got this from a couple other places and I since I am too obsessed at the moment with my school writing I thought I would give it a try...


Outside my window:

It is a warm (high 60s) balmy evening the sky is pink and the warm breeze smells like salt, the palm trees are swaying, the little green parrots are squawking and wheeling in flocks and in general it is the sort of night that makes me want to be outside and not trapped in my classroom.

I am thinking:
That I need to get busy and start calling people for our "Professional Advising Committee" meeting coming up in early April. I wish my great grand boss would get me the time for the meeting so I can let people know for sure when they are needed.

I am thankful for:
So much, my friends whom I love, my job that brings me joy daily, my car that runs, my house with a big yard and nice kitchen, my fireplace, my fish tanks all found cheap, the wonderful weather, that I have food in my fridge, that at my age I am getting good at acceptance, at how damn happy I am etc etc ad gaudium

From the kitchen:
I made this recipe for spicy fried chicken thighs this weekend and they were FANTASTIC. Seriously outstanding, try em if you like spicy chicken. It also works by the way with pounded chicken breasts.

I am wearing:
Navy blue scrubs, white Dansko shoes, white support socks . . . a virtual fashion plate I tell yah

I am creating:
At this exact moment a new blog post for the first time in months, at home I am plotting my new 75 gallon fish tank, how it should be planted, what kind of lighting, what sort of fish etc

I am going:
To visit my lovies in Detroit in just 37 days

I am reading:
"The influence of tumor size and pre-treatment staging on outcome following radiation therapy alone for stage I non-small cell lung cancer."Sandler, Curran and Turrisi Department of Radiation Oncology, Fox Chase Cancer Center, University of Pennsylvania, Philadelphia.

I am hoping:
That the current class on business will not kill me with paper writing and that my lack of interest will not be a problem.

I am hearing:
My students working on their test

Around the house:
Just got 2 beautiful used couches for dirt cheap ($150 bucks), I have not had couches for the 18 months I have lived here in Texas because I didn’t want to schlep them 1900 miles. I didn’t realize it would be so long before I could find something that I liked that would be affordable

One of my favorite things:
Soaking in the bathtub while sipping good red wine, reading a book, and eating super dark chocolate with fruit.

A few plans for the rest of the week:
Beginning to revise my lesson plans for the next class I am teaching - Introduction to Hospital Billing to reflect some new ideas I have to make it more interesting.
This weekend I want to go see the new Magic exhibit at the Museum of Natural History

Words I am pondering:
"In the cicada's cry there is no sign of how soon it will die" Basho

Here is a picture I am sharing:

This is my dog Lily . . .

AHIMA will require CEUs to reflect ICD-10 proficiency

This post is a link discussing AHIMA's current policy on recertification for credential holders for when the new ICD-10 comes into law in October of 2013. Although AHIMA has not listed the total required number of hours of continuing education in ICD-10 to maintain one's credential it is very very advisable to begin now with gathering CEUs so it will not be such a daunting task in whatever amount of time is remaining. Follow the link below for the full article.
AHIMA will require CEUs to reflect ICD-10 proficiency

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